Rapport Mistake Number 6

Now, the final mistake is something that very few people actually ever realise. This is the difference between what I call ‘deep rapport’ and ‘wide rapport’. It is essential when you learn hypnosis online.

Deep rapport is what everyone tries to establish. They try and drill down to the depth of a shared experience.

Let’s say that you and the person that you’re talking to both like motorbikes. And you spend hours and hours and hours talking about motorbikes and motorbike conventions. Now you would think that that was a good thing; that that now you would have a good relationship going.

Well actually, believe it or not, you’ve actually just shot yourself in the foot. Let’s take an example.

Let’s imagine that you had a great teacher at school – someone that you really got on well with. And you loved going to this person’s lessons.
Now one day you’re in the supermarket, shopping with your mother, or perhaps you’re out with your friends, when this teacher – let’s call him Mr. Smith – comes along and starts talking to you, but outside of a school environment. Maybe he’s at a party and you’re at the same party.

How do you feel?

Well, if you’re like most people, you’ll feel a little bit awkward talking to this teacher, maybe in the supermarket or at a party.

Why?

Because the rapport you have is contextualised; it only fits in one specific place. So, when you see the out of context, it somehow feels wrong, or unusual.

This is a mistake that people make time and time again: The boss at work, the person working with clients.

The solution to this mistake is to create what I call Wide Rapport. In wide rapport, you actually give them many different experiences of you, in many different environments.

The way to create wide rapport is essentially one of two things.

Either you meet them in lots of different locations, so that every location creates a new set of memories of you two interacting together. And that creates a wider set of contexts in which it’s okay for you guys to interact.

Another way to create wide rapport is through your use of storytelling. The more stories that you tell about different types of topics/themes/ideas, the more they get a sense of your entire personality and actually build rapport with that.

So you don’t get limited to just one track. You have all these different tracks. And after a while, when you’ve opened enough topics, the other person will spontaneously assume that they can talk to you about anything.

When we get to the storytelling, or hypnotic storytelling part of this course, we’ll give you plenty of exercises and loads of ideas of how to actually tell different kinds of stories that will allow people to build rapport in different ways.

Hypnotic storytelling goes much further than just the ability to build rapport, but it’s very, very important within this context as well.

So, now that you’re aware of the most common mistakes, and have some simple solutions, you can actually begin to refine your abilities to start building rapport with more people and more elegantly as well.

Tagged as: learn hypnosis, learn online, online hypnosis, rapport